i'm afraid

these few days, this week basically. i feel, somehow:

anxious
frightened
restless
uneasy
yearning

for i do not know what
for i do not who
for i do not know on what reason

i feel like i am somewhere else, when i am actually at one particular place

even scattered around, places i do not know

wondering if i am doing the right thing

choosing one particular person over the other

putting myself into the the secret-self commitment


everything needs justification + i am what i decide + whom to be and to be with